It’s Miles Davis’s birthday today. Happy birthday.

Much of my musical influence came from my Grandfather, we called him Pops. There was always music playing in my grandparents house. He loved jazz. Growing up he consistently took me to two places the dog track and Malt Shop Records — a jazz only record store in Denver. Now, long after his death without fail everyday I hear some piece of musicthat reminds me of him.

I have listened to Miles Davis with men. I fucked to his music. I fucked one man in particular and often to the Kind of Blue album, it is long, soulful, deeply painful with spastic bouts of hope– just like our sex was. I recall you telling me Kind of Blue is what I should put on when I bring the next man to my apartment, yet another hint you were on your way out.

Last night I listened to Kind of Blue and watched porn, and thought about you. I took my sweet slow time about it too. I even pulled out the Wet Platinum, I rarely use lube, I don’t need it, but last night I wanted it. I wanted to feel slick when I slid my finger between the slit of flesh, let my tiny clit grow into a greasy nub of electricity.

Then the randomness fills my head–

how strange it is to fuck someone else to the same music.
why did you leave, why did you download Kind of Blue before you did?
i sure like being choked to Arvo Pärt.

My pussy is nice and full, my fingers gliding around, teasing me toward coming. The porn was not really doing it for me so I ended up with about five different tabs open toggling between grunts and groans– keyword searching those shots that do it for me.

hard cock
big cock
wet wet wet pussy
eat pussy
cock worship
throb

By the time I decide to take my panties off my pussy was quite wet, I decide it best to lay the towel down on the chair. Poor office chair. I also grab my new JimmyJane Form 4, the one I have been telling you about, the one that may have an end just small enough to fit in my ass.

The rumble feels like it is kneading my mound, I can feel the flesh wanting to surround the toy. The vibe runs deep into me even though the toy is only riding the surface of my lips. Jumping between images– I watch a redhead suck a big cock, she had glasses on, his cock got huge, by the time he was fully erect she could only fit the head in her mouth.

Tilting back I slide the vibe so its rumble is directly on my star. It really is remarkable how instantly creamy I become. I can hear a sort of slush fill the walls of my cunt, my needy pussy pulling at my fingers wanting to get fucked, as my ass hole twitches in delight from the vibe.

Riding my fingers, I think about how you would finger fuck me. I search for finger fucking– someone should really make a hot hot series of women being finger fucked. We love it, it makes us cum, I want to watch women getting finger fucked by a man who knows how to do it. The pussy licking-finger fuck combination is very underrepresented in pornography. I had to leave it all to my imagination.

By now my cunt had swallowed my fingers, I was now watching two girls, a fully clothed one eating and fucking the completely naked one with a toy. The twist was they were doing it at a party with a group of random spectators at a college party. I did not think it would send me over, but sure enough– I started cumming and I could not back myself down, pumping on to my hands, dripping around the jimmyjane rumbling my ass. It was quick and hard, my breath and mind were in the buzz above everything else and as I began to float back down I could here the sounds of porn and Blue in Green.

I wanted to cum again, sometimes it’s hard to come again, but it is always worth it.

Tilting back further, I know I don’t want to surf the porn anymore, so I go to a saved clip that works for me. A threesome, one girl and two nice thick hard cocks. Placing the jimmyjane right atop of my clit, I make myself grow and flow all together, making me squirm, moan, whimper, and pant for imaginary cum.

The girl is hot in her high heel tie up boots and stay up stocking and her shaved little pussy looking just so nice, oiled and glowing blue under the lights of what is presumably a German sex club. She wants to get fucked, she needs to get fucked– and she is absolutely loving getting fucked, eaten, fingered, sucking those glossed up slobbered on cocks. I watch her orgasm fill the room the men are on her, making her writhe and squirm and beg for their cum. And then I watch her cum again as my own orgasm rolls through me, solid, long and draining–literally. I could feel my towel absorb the cum from underneath me. I like when my tiny little clit gets hard and furious pulling out a streaming line of orgasm gush.

My orgasm seems relentless, only wanting to continue. Moving the vibe back to my ass I fill my cunt with wet fingers, hitting my spot wishing for those two cocks to be fucking me. The porn star– in her orgasm high– points with both hands at her mouth, sign language for– fill me with cum, spray that sweet cum all over my face in all directions. She pleads and begs for it.

The men flanking both side of her torso and face, stroke and stroke- growl and grunt until they cum. The well earned creamy white strands land on her waiting tongue and across her her face and tits. A wonderful climax, I pulled it back several times watching them stroke on top of her, over and over until I too drained every bit of cum from my own body.

I am going to have to do something about this pussy, I was a wet mess all day yesterday. The cunt always thinking first- wants, okay–needs, to be fucked. As a — see how wet I am — experiment I plunged my fingers deep inside of me. No stimulation needed, I was ready, and my pussy swallowed my fingers, when I pulled them out they were coated in wet drops and silky strands and creamy drips. The pussy is ready, the prime time.

As I watched women licking and sucking cock, their lips dropping down around fat throbbing heads I could feel all that liquid surround my fingers and hand. The sound of my wet pussy was almost louder than the sound of porn soundtrack on the screen. I like to watch a woman who really loves sucking cock, not that gagging shove my face around your dick, but that slow, lick, swallow, bring you there, make you rock solid, edge to the brink then right back down. I came numerous times as watched these women of porn worship on these hard pieces of cinema flesh.

I watched myself sucking cock. It was strange. I looked so un-porn, but so into that cock, my mouth filled with your balls as my hand gripped and stroked your shaft. Your moans in the background, the smile on my face, this unmistakable calmness in my demeanor as my lips and tongue please you– just as your cock pleases me.

Anyway, if my insatiable pussy gets as wet as it yesterday, I will have no choice but to be a brazen needy slut and find me that fat thick cock I have been craving.

Porn for lovers

Watching porn with a lover can be tricky to incorporate into your sexual playtime. I have noticed that with certain guys it just doesn’t work. From my experience never try it on the first date. I once ended up kicking a young man out of my apartment because he was more about surfing my computer for porn than than the attention he was paying to me.  Be careful, especially in a new relationship– the porn often becomes the focal point when the only focal point should be each other. It is a delicate balance of finding the right porn to share, and then keeping the focus between each other and what is transpiring on the the screen.

In my past experience with such antics I have been quick to know if the situation will work or not. To be quite honest, it usually doesn’t, but when it does, wow!, what fun we can have. So, I thought I would share my experience and provide maybe some tips on how to watch porn with a date or lover.

First there is the mutual sharing of links. For me I like when a man sends me a link to something that turns him on. I have to be in a certain mood to seek clips out, filtering through the mass garbage of porn (not that I wont do it, if needed) can easily turn me off, just as quickly as it may turn me on. That is why I like when someone has sent me a link. It has been screened and previewed and has some sort of value enough that thought to share it with me. It can work as a sort foreplay, you can tease each other without being with each other.

Even better than a simple mutual sharing of a link is, one created with care, catering to your loved ones sexual proclivities. Even better–if you possess the know how do some editing on the clip, choose the best parts, loop, add your own music–then give the gift of porn this year.

Take care when introducing porn into sexual activity, go slow, choose something fun and frivolous, don’t go straight for hogtied or public disgrace unless you are 100% sure your partner will go for that. Perhaps try films directed by women, there are many great female filmmakers out there, one of my favorites is Erika Lust–glossy with yummy cock licking.

What always works for me is some soft pussy licking that will eventually lead to some cock. But a nice longer clip of pussy worship (PW) often works, it gets me wet, it makes me anticipate your tongue, which will always lead to me needing your cock. Maybe a little girl on girl PW that also simulates male female sexuality–finger fucking, mashing of genitals, finger sucking as though they really wished it was a cock. Plus girls lick girls differently, it can be softer and slower it will get me there every time.

Soon clothing, will shed, skin will become exposed, strokes, kisses, thighs will spread. Your fingertips will be making my lips full and my clit grow.

Then bring on the cock. Introduce some good cock sucking, not gagging, choking, make her cry cock sucking, but some shaft licking, tip kissing, ball cupping slobber you up cock sucking. In no time she will be on her knees between your thighs with your growing cock grazing her lips, both enjoying one another and the porn.

One of the best dates I’ve had lately was a night in listening to a selected palylist while we watched Beneath the Valley of the Ultra Vixen’s. It is silly campy big tits bouncing fun. Which is exactly how our sex turned out that night. We wrestled around the floor, I bounced my tits everywhere in his face while I rode him, I acted like cow girl riding a horse with my tits swaying. We even ended up in tangled 69, licking, sucking, cumming, and laughing the night away while Russ Meyer iconography flickered away.

My last words of advice—
Talk about it before hand or at least get a feel about how your partner feels about porn, before springing it on them. Choose wisely. Be prepared, plan, have some things ready, saved and stored way in case an opportunity should arise. Surprise, mystery and some good old fashioned romance is still the key to intimacy. When done properly, a date of porn can be all those things.

Leaning back in the office chair my thighs spread open wide accommodating to your body as you kneel between me. It almost feels like you are examining my anatomy the way your fingers and tongue explore. Your licks cause me to swell, making my clit sharp, pronounced and electric. From this position–almost hovering over your face, your fingers working from gentle to a cadenced bang is a sure way to make me pour all down your hand and face.

“I want to make you cum.”

Music to a woman’s ear.

“Do you want to watch something?”

Because it was not really planned or part of our play and I was certainly ready for you to make me cum I did not want surf around to find something that would work to get both of us off–so I went for one of my old stand-bys, one that never fails to make me cum with sweet agony, force and quite often a flood.

The screen glows, you drop between my thighs, I watch you lick and fuck me with everything but your cock. In and out I drift from flicker of solid cock hitting juicy soaking pussy to tilting  my head back into my own lost pleasures. The sounds of fucking and ambient groove drone fill the room. You bring me to these peaks, then back down, your tongue relaxing and ecstatic simultaneously.

When you look up at me to joke about how my clit is a “grower not a shower” your face glistens covered in me, wet and dripping from your lips.

“Kiss me.”

I reach out, bringing your face to mine, for a taste of me.

Back down you go. I drift and the porn becomes noise, and only and momentary images filter in through my sexed out slits of eyes.

“Cum on me.”

Yes, you have figured out, how mentioning cumming drives me closer and closer to that point. My ass begins to rock into your hand, filling your mouth. I know if I watch the screen long enough I will see our young starlet spray all over that huge rock hard cock of  a co-star.

As your face gets lost, I watch, and mutter words of cumming.

“oahh I’m gonna cum, gonna cum.”

Reassuring myself that I will cum and some sort of attempt to give you some warning of what is about to happen from within me. Harder you fingers hit, two deep inside pushing that spot, while you fist hits the fat flesh of pussy meat I have become and your mouth and tongue continue devotional devouring. Fuck Yeah... for that moment I am the happiest, lost in my cunt and in this man. The porn is gone, everything is fuzzy except the two of us–clear, focused, my cunt on fire and thumping.

“I’m gonna cum.”

Lifting your face a bit, you hand pounds harder into me and I meet each with a thrust of my own, and cum hard onto you. Because your hand and fingers are filling me I cum in slow driving river down your arm, grinding as much of your into me I can get. That moment is when I feel like you could just about shove your whole fist and arm into me and I would happily fuck it, all of it. But as soon as I come down from the heavens of my soaking cum, my pussy becomes ultra sensitive.

“Slow, slow,”

I mange to moan out.

I am a spent, wet mess of a girl, the towel under my ass, the floor, your hands, arm, face nicely covered in me.

In my sweetest post cum, I promise to be a good kitty voice…

“will you lick me some more”

The blue glow, sometimes makes me feel alone. I can see you on the other end–we connect, we can watch the same clips of women coming–and men getting their cocks sucked. A shared pornographic experience. Engaging our bodies for the other and for ourselves on the glow, but we remain apart and after we cum we are still alone.

This sterility of the web cam sex is what takes me some time to warm up to–in order to have this shared web cam moment. It is the same as real time sex, I need some foreplay. In fact I need more, to make me relax and feel comfortable fucking myself for you–with you in front of the little camera within my machine.

We spent a half hour, maybe even more talking about the day–talking about New York–talking about libraries–that always gets me going.

Feeling comfortable, the vulnerability dissipated–my clothing did the same. Soon I was naked in my new ergonomic office chair (it’s got great tilt-ability). You are already naked, you stay naked. Your cock is thick and waving at me, it is heavy and throbbing red, I know what it feels like, but I cannot feel it.

We start sending the other clips to watch. Two girls, fuck machines, amateur couples.

“I’ll be right back” I chimed.

I watch my own round ass disappear from the computer screen–I am gone from view. Upon return I have a towel for the chair and my new JimmyJane Iconic Smoothie. I love this new toy it reminds me of my very first vibrator I bought from the mall at Spencer gits–in the gag wedding gift section (but could never replace my TV remote control). This is a simple white basic vibrator, but it is waterproof and super powerful and easy to control the speed.

Holding it up to the camera for you to see I slide it across my lips and in my mouth wanting it to be your dick. Together we watch the eager girls lick each others pussy, I watch you stroke your cock, you watch me spread my thighs. My fingers slip into my folds, my hand grasps around my tits, making the nipple hard and erect.

“god I love seeing your tits.”

I mash them together for you, body language for–your cock could be here.

Propping my feet on the desk, dropping my thighs wide, I slide my fingers down deep into my pages and bring them back up to my lips.

“What do you taste like today?”
I lick and respond,
“Tasteless.”
“Oh your not tasteless.”

But I am, on the surface, I taste nothing, just the mildest of lemon salt. I am not flowing enough yet to become flavorful, I plunge deeper with my fingers, the walls of my cunt–feels hot, soft velvet and in mind I imagine the darkest of red–grabs my digits and pulls. I need to be fucked. I need cock.

Pulling my finger out they are coated, creamed, and taste of sweet and tangy, I lick them and bury them back in.

On my split screen set up (geek porn) I watch the amateur couple fuck and on the other I watch the squirting girl with the beautiful pussy squirt all over the fuck matching and in between I watch you stroking your thick root of a cock. Further I tilt, bringing the vibrator to my full lips, to my clit, my pussy jumps and clinches around my finger and the flow begins. Pussy streams down my ass cheeks and onto the towel under me. As I seem to slip even lower into the chair I watch all three glowing scenes.

Everything becomes ultra quiet–the vibe is the only thing I seem to hear. I am no longer focused on any one thing in particular, in fact it is all out of focus–like I am watching porn with my glasses off.

Fucking my fingers, I raise my ass off the chair and grind. Fucking my hand like it’s cock. I need cock. The jimmyjane nailing my clit making liquid surge. My pussy is full and fat with blood and life. Everything is so quite, I am barely making a noise–all sound is blocked inside of me, my body tense with locked noise and I fuck.

When I come it is intense wet soaking, painful, relieving, freeing and silent. I feel like I made not a sound. My hands still in me the vibe still rumbling I stay there and ride another wave of silent orgasm, I feel my self coming, I know I am soaking through onto my new chair and I don’t care. I pour and pussy is alive and full–she is a fucking animal–and I don’t care. And I come and I come.

In my come moment I beg you,
“Cum on my pussy….please.”

A begging sigh for your come as my pussy is still throbbing and deeply clenching my fingers–I sense you coming.

“Cum on me.”

Tweet

It has been that week were my body is in prime form. Ready to be fucked, now, later, again, and now. It is not because of a lack of cock, but for some reason, I just didn’t call on them. I am slightly perplexed? It seems I would rather stay home and fuck myself and watch some porn or IM, or watch porn and IM. I am perplexed because, to me, it feels like I am always in that eternal search for cock, and then when I have a choice between choosing from several, I choose myself. Not very slutty of this slut.

It has been fun though. Right now as I write this my cunt has that aching throb, knowing I am writing about sex. Now I will have to come before I go to work, there is no choice on that.

This week I had online sex and it was hot, wet, soaking–a hot mess. It was a good thing I put that towel down. We chatted for awhile then it turned sexual. He asked certain things of me and I did them, sometime I don’t, but for some reason with this man I did. He asked me to spread my thighs wide in the chair, feel the length of my thighs, spread them wider with my hands. Then to feel my full lips, slipping a few fingertips into my wetness beginning to spread myself open.

When ever I partake in IM sex I need lots of filthy words, I need to know what your are going to do me, what you want me to do to you, to know that you are about to split me open with your tongue, taste me from the inside out. I need to hear your cock is solid and that you are stroking it, imaging it is my hands and soon my tongue. My mouth.

My partner had the words flowing, my cunt was pulsating and liquefying–dripping, sloshing around my fingers, I could hear it. I took picture of my legs spread wide sitting on my beach towel, my fingers with chipped nail-polish filling my wet pussy, spreading my lips for the camera. I begged for more words, as I typed my juices spilled a cloudy mix onto the keyboard. Begging for more lusty paragraphs, sentences, words, letters. I came in a sloshing soak, and I let it ride–my fingers deep in me. I know when I come once like this I can come three or more times like this, maintaining the pressure in that full spot inside, juicing every last drop from my tangy twat. Thighs shaking, breath rapid, and still ready for more.

I got dressed and ready for the work day, but something drew me back, ok it was my clamorous snatch that drew me back for just a little porn peek. This is what I ended up watching. I love the very beginning, the way his cock rides in her pussy, not pounding, but a pulling pushing in a slow cadence, her folds responding and surrounding his cock. Plus she is soaking wet, his cock is so perfectly shaped and rock hard and her pussy accepts it just right. Pulling out my magic bullet I shove it into my panties and lay it down hard on my clit cranking it all the way up. I waste no time. My fingers thrust up into my cunt. He flips her and pounds away into her pussy. Wait! something is happening, her pussy starts to spasm and clinch and grabs his cock into her, then he pulls out and she soaks and sprays all over him. He rubs and knocks all into her bursting lips, taping, hitting his dick tip in that wet wet pussy. I have three finger in my own, with the palm of the same hand pushing the bullet into my clit.

She rides him in reverse for a bit, impaled on his length, she lets loose and sprays him again, her juice hitting the camera lens. Wet slut. She rubs her wet cunt all over his shaft, relishing in it, savoring that hardness of his. She gets off his lap and licks herself up from his beam and thighs. He gets her flipped over again, and fucks her eye to eye, sweat sappy secretions make her lips glisten and his cock shine. My panties are soaking, a wetness overtakes the fabric. I spread my legs and take a picture of it, a fantasy fueled by one very saucy email. I want to soak my panties for him and send him the pictures. Is that so wrong?

The assail on her continues, she just wants to spray that cock again. Everything in view is soaking wet. He is close, ready, but I just know that wet slut is going to spray him one last time before he gets to come. Her pussy is being split, porno grunts and growls emanate. And she lets go–I let go. My panties fully soak, her cunt being pounded on by the tip of his cock, splashing her love liquid everywhere. I pull my fingers out from my depths for a moment and let my fluid push out, flow out, then shove them back in as I rub my wetness all over my fat lips with my other hand. The magic bullet has lost it’s way to the floor. My panties soaked–I snap another picture. I know it is close to the ending, I want to come again. So with my fingers pulled in deep pressing and massaging the spot, I–with fervor–work my cunt, my clit, and the folds surrounding. Slick, sticky and yummy am I. I fuck. He slows–almost to a stop as his cum spills out of her and his hand wraps around the base of his cock and balls. With my three fingers shoved deep inside me, I give one last push and then bring them out. Releasing that last gush, my clit at full attention, tender to the touch, my eyes half open, my panties thoroughly soaked. I snap one last shot and email them to my favorite protagonist.

originally posted 8/5/09

Last night I had three separate dreams of beautiful hard cock passing my lips.

It has been non stop since my return home, last night was the first night I had a break, nothing to–well I could have done that mountain of laundry–but I opted for my big bed and a movie. I lasted about a half hour before I drifting into dream land.

It was simple, pure–a soft gentle blow job. No hurry, no fanaticism. I was using a lot of tongue, up and down your cock. Enjoying the way I made you grow with my licks. Holding you balls in my palm, with slight tugs–they fill my hand nicely. Licking upwards to you tip, a drop of gloss formed, dipping my finger in, I rubbed it into your head. Eyes locked. I need more. My tongue circles around your crown licking, then up the shaft again, the a side lip suck. What was strange is, I never actually got into a full on mouth fuck, I just slid around, licking, gently using my hands and fingers–feeling the blood flow and your dick throb under my touches.

“your mouth feels so good”

When you came–my tongue was working the back side of your shaft, with each upward lick your cum spurted out, a nice strong spurt at first landing on your belly- then smaller spurts, dripping between my fingers.  I continue, as you continue to flow, circling the area before your big round head, then the head. The amount of cum is astounding to me, the taste sweet and salty, the smell– saliva, cock and cum.

You know I had to wake up and watch some porn after that one. My guilty pleasure porn in bed from the laptop. Sifting through some bad blow jobs and worse fucks, I found one that did it for me, my fingers fill me, then my big bulbed vibe hits me. After the dream and with nice big cock and wet pussy glowing in my face it only took a moment for me to cum. So cum again and again, along with the porn couples cum shot.

Well…see what happens when I talk about porn or write about porn, I get distracted.

The retelling of my dream cock is over, because now I am watching porn, my pussy is so wet, so needy, she is thumping to be fucked. I know if slide my fingers in it will be ultra slick, I must go fuck myself now. Needy slut. Insatiable cunt.

Apologies for the abrupt ending. Trust me, I was dreaming of sucking cock. beautiful hard cock in and out of my mouth, cumming in my mouth, swallowing you down, on my face, your dick running all over my lips and tongue, playfully slapping my cheeks and lips. Oh that sound of wet cock smacking onto my tongue.

Celebration

oh jeeze…

I have been wanting to get down to writing about my wet weekend, but last night at ten o’clockt I decided it was a good  idea to go to a friend/co-workers birthday/graduation party. Woo Hoo! Librarians Gone Wild.

My ass is dragging, and hung over HUNG OVER. I do hope my patrons will be understanding and kind to my tender, maybe still drunk, situation today, I would hate to jump over the reference desk and go primate on their asses.  Gin martinis are yummy.

So, yet again I am bringing one out from the vaults.

A Sweet and Dirty Love Fuck Story or The Librarian and the Writer

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When we lay in bed and I ask you to tell me a story, you don’t hesitate. I love that. You are coy, bitter sweet, scared, unsure, honest, brave, and damaged. I love that.

We meet–check each others flaws, as much as we can in an hour. We drink; your hands begin to creep. Our lips familiarize. You ask the questions most guys ask, “is everything you write about true, did all that really happen?” I guess you find it intriguing, exciting, yet somewhere jealousy lies. We are curious creatures, excited by our sexuality and those of other, but get so pained by the same thing we find exciting. The cruelty of duality.

You ask me “did you really fuck a guy in the alley?” I look at you, ask with my eyes, if you really want to know, and we change the subject. We walk down the street like we have been lovers for a lifetime rather than just one night. Comfortability came easy.

We get to your place. Pour us a glass of cheap scotch, and then move to your room. For some reason I feel a level of security, that makes me want to strip down. You watch, as my skirt drops, as the soft cotton shirt falls to the floor, you’re slightly nervous but equally turned on by my confidence. I wrap your arms around me. Kiss, kiss, kiss. Breathing me deeply, saying “you smell like a cookie.” I smile then lower myself to your cock. I can feel the swell beneath your pants as you release a moan.

Our night is long, and full. We prolong cumming until morning. Not really caring, no urgent sense of release. We bring each other to the brink, then back off. I ask if you want to watch some porn, eagerly you set up some girl on girl action, from the glowing screen we hear the exaggerated groaning, the sounds of pussy being devoured. Your eyes glued to the glimmer of plastic beautiful ass. As I work your cock, I stroke my own pussy and am stunned by the sound that fills the air. I ask “do hear how wet I am?” You nod with lift of your brow. It’s like ocean waves splashing over the folds of skin–like those giant rock formations protruding out of the water the closer you get to land–the water encompassing, then violently breaking over each mass. The deeper I become involved into your cock, the deeper my fingers plunge into my cunt, and the passionate waves of wet, drip between my finger, I am so soaked, that I am sure I am flowing onto the floor. Your cock filling my mouth, one hand wrapped around the base, cupping your tightened balls, the other deeply fucking my own pussy. We stay in this passion grapple for an eternity. Our sight and sound mingling with those of porn propaganda, the room smells like a sex den, sirens fill the night air, we hear people screaming from the street below, but we are lost in our own night of licentiousness that nothing else can penetrate.

In exhaustion we move to your bed. Drifting in and out, of here and there, in some form of sex induced sleep to wakefulness, my hand never leaves your cock, hard or soft, it becomes and extension of me. I dream about strange things, like they are real, and each time I wake I am entangled into you. Upon one of these dream induced wakes, I begin to embrace your cock more, my body and hungry mouth follow. I begin to taste you. Fill myself. My ass up for viewing and caressing. I labor my mouths love across your dick and am filled with the sudden urge for you to taste me. I straddle your face, my mouth still employed on your stiff bindle, and you begin to drink me in. You mouth and tongue satiate me, as I downpour onto you. Your hands spreading my ass, pulling me deeper onto your face. We delight in the ravage of one another, greedy, starving, and ambitious to please. I love that. I roll off you exhausted, my pussy ripe and full. We sleep to the sound of the city.

Sunlight begins its flood, my hand wanders to your cock, I love feeling of growth under my hand. Solid. I cannot stand it any longer– I attack you squishing you. You love that. I am grinding the fuck out you, sexing the essence, like poetry– life distilled in this moment. I look at you, you look at me, we lock, I pull every drop of you I can. Your cock lost inside of me as I squeeze, clamp and consume. The folded, unfold, we cave, collapse and sleep again, turning into the other. I have the urge to tell you I love you, but I let the moment pass. Regret.

I wonder about your aboutness as I drift, again, in and out of sex induced slumber. I wake– it is time for me to slink, retreat, and disappear. The love struggle must end, work must begin. I get to the library, no shower, no clean up and smell of fucking, my secret unconcealed to those who come close enough to smell me. I drift all day helping patrons, but am not really there, still drifting in sex slumber–thinking of time spent and passed.

originally published 3/5/09

I received a lovely little letter the other day from a reader who signed her note as, Your own little Lolita (I could use my very own Lolita). She enjoys the tumblr, but prior to spending “quality time stroking her kitty” likes to read the blog. Ahh, I am so pleased. She was seeking my “well seasoned” pornography advice. Which I actually do feel like a sort of expert on the subject. I need a bumper sticker “I <3 Porn.” On average I probably watch some form of video porn at the least 3 times a week, on most weeks, but I do not always masturbate to cum with it. Usually it just happens while in my eternal picture harvesting quest. Of course there are time when it’s well thought out, planned, and definitely needed– if I’m planning my porn time.

There are bouts of time when I will go without, usually if I am getting fucked on a consistent basis or if  I am insanely busy in life. For me, too much porn comes when I have too much time on my hands. I have written about my fascination with the subject many times, and will continue to do so, I am absolutely infatuated with it– as a past time, a turn on, an industry and as an addiction. Pornography is a part of my sexuality from the formative years on.

I wrote this piece after a summer vacation home, I spent a lot time with women in traditional MF relationships –who had strong opinions on the subject. The letter from Lolita was a reminder that there are women who like porn, and even those who like to watch it with you. So…keep your eyes open, your cock hard, and ask your date if she might be interested in viewing a little video steam to heat things up a bit.

Consensus

I had some interesting conversations with women about pornography. Many of my female friends, particularly those with spouses or partners, are very anti-porn. They hold the belief that once in a relationship–porn is not necessary or that they alone, should be enough sexually to their man. I have a friend, recently married, whose husband is an expert geek porn watcher. He comes home from a night out, and every once in awhile he will watch himself a bit of smut, okay multi-screened toggling back and forth between various screen images of sucking and fucking. While doing this he fucks himself (of course), often into a sleepy haze in his office chair. She has “caught” him mid act and post act pants around the ankle asleep in the chair.

Her opinion is one of hidden acceptance. Something that disgusts her, yet something she knows may never change. She calls it the “ugly side” of marriage she never wants to see. She also holds that feeling that if he is horny enough to watch porn he should just come fuck her instead.Even more extreme was the woman who was, violently, adamant about not “allowing” her man to watch porn and that if he did it would be an end to the relationship.

To me this is just plain crazy and unrealistic thinking. This way thinking about the porn issue creates lies between partners; one not wanting the other to partake and the other lying about partaking. I have put the question to many male friends/co-workers/acquaintances about watching porn, most agree–that it is not something that their partners want them doing, but they do it anyway. Choosing to lie about the behavior and watch when they can, or not lying and suffering the consequences of their porn pleasure. This behavior between lovers is what makes it ugly, and it makes those who watch porn feel guilty (which some derive pleasure from), and those who love them feel less of a partner, less of a woman.

There are those special rays of brilliant sunshine, the women who enjoy porn, watch porn, and seek out sexy decadent imagery of legs spread, splayed, wet folds being filled with a fine hard cock. There are those of us who like to watch, who like to share in the eroticism that dirty porn can provide. It can be exhilarating, exciting, hot, and lead to a rocking good time with each other.

As for the notion of “why doesn’t he just come fuck me instead,” well this is a sensitive issue for a lot of women. It hits on issues of self worth and body self esteem for many of the women I spoke to.

Thinking they should be enough of woman for their partner. I see this as having nothing to do with the matter of love or the sexuality a partner has and holds for the other (if it is really a genuine relationship). He doesn’t love you any less because he fucks himself to Internet porn.

It is more just a matter of–stroking your own cock feels good, finger fucking your wet pussy feels good. Dildos, be it flesh silicone, hard plastic, glass, stainless steel or double ended, vibrating-bulbs, balls, bullets, shafts, and wands feel fucking good. And it all feels better when you are watching a woman being devoured, her pages licked open, dripping, her cunt being filled with hardness, her pussy petals being pulled out and then pushed back in by a throbbing glistening cock–it makes me want to plunge my fingers into my own petals and let it feel fucking good.

While these women sat and spoke, I shook my head in disagreement, presented my argument, but in the end was the minority ray of sunshine in the group. Consuming porn either alone, for your own pleasure, or with another for shared pleasure feels fucking good.

For me I watch a variety of imagery. Sometimes I will pay for it, sometime I will hit up the RedTube or Porn Hub, lately I have been checking out the clips on explicite art. I just watch the series of free clips, then I watch my favorite one when I am ready to cum. Sometimes I use my fingers au naturale, sometimes I use my magic bullet,or my German engineered big blue vibrating cock, many times both. I like to get the dildo all wet by sucking on it–slobbering all over it, I get my pussy wet by fingering my self, then slow slide it inside me, then turn it on and fuck myself to coming. Post come I sit there with big blue still inside me, rumbling lowly around my pulsing orgasm, and when I pull it out I slide it back between my lips and taste my own juice.

My favorite clip for the last few days has been Anna Polina, young horny Russian girl , she “wants to do naughty things.” There is a scene where she is dripping on to her partners belly while he fucks he in the ass–(big sigh) it is so hot–that is the point I watch over and over and of course the end cum shots. In the final moments there is one incredible curved cock I love to watch be stroked and shoot.

Now if you will excuse me, I a have a lil’ somthin’ somthin’ to attend to. Care to join me?

Previously published on 7/22/09